Church

“For your life – Flee!” by Sean Brendan Stewart – Reform & Revive | a Plugfest

/ Paul Burkhart / 1 Comment

sorry, no y-axis this time

sorry, no y-axis this time

[Thank you to spectacular photographer and friend David Schrott for inspiring this post]

Okay, due to a few recent articles I’ve written, the number of people visiting my blog has increased by over 4000% in the past week.  It’s pretty nuts.  That’s why everything has seemed to be about Derek Webb and his new album, Stockholm Syndrome.  So, I just wanted to take this chance to put in a few plugs for some of my other projects.

I have web magazine called Reform & Revive.  It looks at the intersection between faith and culture, politics, art, the church, and just life in general.  These Derek Webb posts would perhaps have been more appropriate on that site, but the readership here jumped up so fast (I’m actually on the first page of most Google searches having to do with the album).

Anyway, friend, brother, and fellow impassioned writer, Sean Brendan Stewart, just put up a special article that seems to have a similar message as the new Webb album.  It’s some commentary from him, then a very brief manuscript of some audio from a Carter Conlon message.  After that, feel free to look at our more regular full articles from our Contributors.

Lastly, I have my own personal site, Prodigal Paul, that acts as a hub for organizing other blogs, Bible studies, sermons, and such that I have produced over the years.

That is all.

Derek Webb’s “Stockholm Syndrome”| a preliminary album review

/ Paul Burkhart / 26 Comments

[NOTE: this is not a review of the whole album, just an impression from the songs released so far]

He has said it is his most important album to date.  But no matter what, Derek Webb’s Stockholm Syndrome will not be just an album. Regardless of the music, production, or vocals, this album will first and foremost be a manifesto, an indictment, a message. The lyrics will define this album. This album – this artist, even – has become a voice for an entire group of disgruntled twenty-something Christians that have surveyed the rolling hills of American evangelicalism and have found it lacking. They have called out for a prophet to say the words and use the language that will draw the line in the sand and separate the “Biblical” sheep from the “fundamentalist” goats. A man to come out in sackcloth and ashes and save real grace-driven Christianity from the clutches of the legalistic drones that would rob us of our freedom in Christ.

So, the question I have struggled with ever since the first songs on this album came out is: is this the right message spoken in the right way to the right people at the right time?

I hate saying it, but (from what we’ve seen so far) I don’t think so. There is a time and a place for the message this album seems to carry, don’t get me wrong. I don’t write off a song done by a Christian just because it has a curse word or says things sharply. The Old Testament prophets spoke just as harshly (if not more so) to the “church” at that time. They would call women cows (Amos 4:1), say that the people “lusted” after other gods like some dream of fornicating with others with penises the size of donkeys and ejaculations like that of horses (Ezekiel 23:20), and declare that the best things we ever did were nothing more than rags dipped in a woman’s menstruation tossed before the face of God (Isaiah 64:6).

I fancy Derek Webb sees himself as such a prophet, just as I know many of his fans do. Now, I think this harsh tone is absolutely appropriate and the balance is struck with all of Webb’s previous albums. But the vehemence of the songs released so far from Stockholm is off-putting and seems a bit out of place. It’s not just a declaration that the church is off on a few points and how they’ve gone about some things – all the songs are a mockery and sarcastic rant against her. As a friend well put it: this album probably will not accomplish the goal for which Derek set off writing this record. Rather than shock the church into reform, this album is far more likely to galvanize the opposition force against the church and those that think the Church has become so out of touch and impotent it has become unimportant all together.

I know that’s not Webb’s heart. Anyone that’s heard the album 2003’s She Must and Shall Go Free knows this. The songs from Stockholm Syndrome seem to form an epistle from a wounded lover. A man who loves the Bride of Christ so much he hates how she has gone a stray and has been personally affected and hurt by it. But I wish he would take a page out of Hosea and try to play a part in wooing the church back rather than trying to beat her back.

I just want to say it again: this criticism is not about language or tone. I am really not bothered by the “bad words” used or the forceful tone. Perhaps my favorite song ever recorded by any artist, “Wedding Dress“, has both of these elements, and yet it is geared more towards Webb’s own depravity rather than the Church’s flaws. Look, I have the same criticisms as him. Raised as a Dallas, Texas Southern Baptist, my family has been destroyed by the effects of fundamentalism and “easy believism”. But Jesus said He is building His church, so we must try and find the balance between working with Christ in building it or mocking what He’s done so far, and thereby working against the work Christ would have us do. I fear this album is the latter.

Much has changed on the landscape of American Christianity since Webb’s 2007 album The Ringing Bell. The Church has effectively lost its grip on pop culture, politics, and the prevailing worldview of the nation. This being the case, these songs from Stockholm Syndrome come on the scene too late and kick the church while she’s down, as it were.

But, at some point today, Derek is supposed to begin pre-orders for the album accompanied by immediate digital downloads. So when that happens, I’ll be sure to put up a more comprehensive review as soon as possible.

I pray he surprises us.  Thoughts, anyone?

It is done: Derek Webb’s “Stockholm Syndrome” album release + new free song

/ Paul Burkhart / 10 Comments

Untitled

[WARNING: there’s a “bad” word mentioned a few times in this post]

[Also, for those reading this on Facebook, click here to read this on my actual blog, so you can watch the videos, stream the music, and download the audio more easily.]

Well, it’s done.  After all the drama, Derek Webb’s new album “Stockholm Syndrome” is set for release this Tuesday.  Apparently, if you pre-order the album off his website on Tuesday, you will be able to get a free download of the entire album immediately.

But –

this revelation did not come before another song – the song of the album perhaps – was released.  Anyone who has been following this situation knows that Derek has been releasing “stems” (or pieces of the song) for a while.  This is the song with the cursing that started this whole thing.  It is a song that has been titled “What Matters More” and it has to do with the Church’s treatment of homosexuals.  So without further ado, here are all the songs that have been released off of Derek Webb’s newest album “Stockholm Syndrome”.  Enjoy and be sure to download them all on Tuesday.

Thanks again to Shane for the update.  The name above each streaming song is a link to the actual file for you to download.  Right-click or whatever you do to download these things.

“What Matters More?”

“Freddie, Please”

“Heaven”

“The Spirit vs. the Kick-Drum”

It sounds like the new song is what inspired (or vice versa) Webb’s recent purchase of the domain GiveAShit.org, which he plans on using as a fundraising site.  The site’s had no content on it for a while, but just now as I saw that it has a black screen on it, apparently holding the spot for new content coming soon (Tuesday, perhaps?).  We’ll see.

Lastly, I heard from musical artist and friend Joel Rakes (so if it’s not true, blame him – or the people he follows on Twitter) that there was also a documentary done about this whole thing, so keep an eye out for that.  And check out Joel’s stuff while you’re at it.

Here are other sites concerning Webb and the album. Please visit these as well to support the artist and his craft.

For those that don’t even know about Derek Webb and his music, here are a few of my favorite songs by him. Yeah, he’s pretty stinking good. [Once again, if you’re on facebook, these videos may not show up, so click here to watch them]

“Wedding Dress” off of “She Must and Shall Go Free”
Vodpod videos no longer available.

“Medication” off of “I See things Upside Down”
Vodpod videos no longer available.

“My Enemies Are Men Like Me” off of “Mockingbird”
Vodpod videos no longer available.

What is Faith? (a call to Atheism)

/ Paul Burkhart / 3 Comments

art by Amy Roberts

art by Amy Roberts (see bottom for link)

My good friend Monica sent me an email with a link to this New York Times blog that had a little weekend competition:

define “Faith”

The post gave the Bible’s definition of faith, a few quotes from others on what faith is and then told other “co-vocabularists” to offer their definitions (the pithier the better).

In a display ad absurdem and ad nauseam of the make-up of NYTimes readers, the vast majority of “definitions” are atheistic rants about how faith is just believing things that are so plainly and clearly not true.  It’s the opiate of the masses.  It’s the crutch that helps weak-minded people get through life.  So on and so forth.

I understand the sentiment.  I do.  And I also see why they think that.  It was just comical seeing post after post after post of people that were so clearly speaking from such bitterness, hurt, and pain that went well beyond “calm, collected reason”.  Even the atheist puts some level of faith in things, even though they feel like this faith is justified by their logical deductions.  Faith isn’t a bad word.  It doesn’t have to be religious at all.  My mac dictionary’s first definition for it is “complete trust or confidence in someone or something.”  The second definition is the religious one!  But in spite of this, that word, for some reason, touches such a deep nerve within those hostile to Christianity that they must do more than simply display a disagreement with a prevailing notion.  It’s not good enough being a-theistic, they must be anti-theistic.

And that, I find, is very interesting.  It implies that atheism is more than a lack of belief.  It can’t stay at that merely reasoned philosophical place.  It is at its core a most outward expression of the rebellion of the heart, and the antagonism of that rebellion must and will come out.

Don’t get me wrong, I love atheists! I do!  But it looks like Atheism is becoming the new radical fundamentalism of the urban United States.  Now I know how absurd all us Christians probably looked for the past 50+ years with all of our political activism, ad hominem attacks on dissenters, made-up “culture wars” to agitate our base, over-excessive vitriol against “opponents” of our system, a circling of the wagons to maintain a false sense of security for “us” and ease of insult towards “them”, and a childish fanatical assent to a few tired (fundamental) tenets with a few tired (apologetic) defenses made by a few tired (hyperbolic, caricatured) leaders that are already irrelevant.

I guess its Atheism’s turn to take the wheel.  Try not to mess up the country in the same ways we did.  Neither you guys nor us have history on our side when it comes to our particular systems reigning supreme.  Things just don’t seem to go well.  Have fun.

As far as my contribution to the discussion?  Here was the little definition I gave:

FAITH: trusting that another has accomplished on your behalf what you ought to have done but can’t.

Grace and peace.

and Faith.

[more artwork by Amy Roberts can be found here]

Some thoughts on our “Christian” Nation

/ Paul Burkhart / 5 Comments

I recently received a facebook request to join the cause: “Tell Obama America is a Christian Nation”.  Coming from the Bible-belt, this was certainly a worldview that I am very familiar with and one that I’ve thought through extensively ever since I was old enough to vote.   I think I have come to a few conclusions concerning the matter.  Please leave feedback.

America isn’t a christian nation.

First, “Christian” is never used as an adjective in the Bible.  There’s no such thing as a “Christian” anything, except for a person.  Sure, for most of its history most people living in America have been Christians, but if you have mostly Christians living in a certain apartment complex, would it suddenly be called a “Christian” apartment complex?  Most all of America’s founders were Universalists (John Adams), Unitarians (Thomas Jefferson), Masons (Ben Franklin), and Deists (pretty much all the rest).  Hardly any were Orthodox Christians in any recognizable sense of the word other than the fact that they used the words “God” and “Creator”, but so do a lot of other groups that clearly aren’t Christians.

Second, there’s a big difference between checking off “Christian” on a poll and actually being a Christian.  Sure most people still check that off, but I would say that the percentage of people that are actually saved, born-again, living-the-life, actually loving Jesus Christians out there is less than half.  It certainly feels that way living in the city, at least.

Thirdly, at the very least, even if America was “founded on Christian ideals”, the nature of a democracy/republic is that it changes with the public beliefs.  Even if it used to be a Christian nation, the basic worldview of the citizenry has changed, so “what” the nation “is” has changed.  The “public” define the nature of a democracy/republic, not its past.

Lastly, every time in history that Christianity has been used to describe a country, it’s never gone well (see: Constantine, the Inquisition, the Crusades, etc.).  I pray America becomes a nation of Christians, but for the vast majority of its history, Christianity has done a lot better when it was in the minority (China, anyone?).  We don’t fight for numbers of people or a percentage of a population or an office in politics.

We fight for the Glory of Christ.

Any thoughts?

Here’s a very balanced and helpful article from Patrol Mag, and here are some lyrics from a favorite Derek Webb Song of mine, “In God we Trust”:

In God we trust
and the government is on His shoulders
in God we trust
through democracy and tyranny alike
in God we trust
He uses both good and evil men

in God we trust
so we fight for peace and He fights for us
in God we trust
even when He fights us for someone else
in God we trust
even when He looks like the enemy

in God we trust
even though our hearts are bankrupt
in God we trust
for more than just the value of our dollar bills
in God we trust
but there’s no gold behind these notes of reserve

in God we trust
even through our great presumption
in God we trust
even though He favors no nation-state
in God we trust
even when the blessing is a curse

Derek Webb’s “Stockholm Syndrome” {“Freddie, Please” pt. II}

/ Paul Burkhart / 11 Comments

derekwebb.jpg

[TO ANYONE THAT COMES ACROSS THIS POST: there is updated information and another song on a later post.  All the songs found here are also there, in addition to the much anticipated song off the new record “What Matters More?”  Here’s the link for that post.]

It has been brought to my attention that yesterday’s post is already out of date. Apparently, there was a 12-hour window to download the song. I’ve received a couple of requests to make the music file available for download here. After much thought about the ethics of it all, I’m thinking that since Derek Webb did post it up for free, and he didn’t include any statement prohibiting this, I’ll go ahead and post a link to download it. If any representatives of Webb see this and want me to take this down, I’ll be glad to do so. I really want to support Derek in any way.

[UPDATE: Thanks to Shane Bertou for posting these other audio files up. In the article, he also has the so far assembled audio from the currently released “stems” that form Webb’s song that apparently is being referred to as “Stockholm Syndrome” for the time being.]

So on that note, here’s a link to download the new song “Freddie, Please” off of Derek Webb’s upcoming album “Stockholm Syndrome”, along with the other full songs that have been released so far:

“Freddie, Please” by Derek Webb

from Shane’s site:

“Heaven”

“The Spirit vs. the Kick-Drum”

Thanks to Angina Pectoris for bringing these other recordings to my attention.

Here are other sites concerning Webb and the album. Please visit these as well to support the artist and his craft.

Grace and peace.

Derek Webb’s new free song about Fred Phelps

/ Paul Burkhart / 6 Comments

Untitled[EDITOR’S NOTE:  there was apparently a 12- hour window in which to download this song.  That window having passed, I have made the song available on another post on this site.  Continue reading if you want the story behind the song. Click here for the article.]

If you don’t care about background, story, or mystery, and just want free music and lyrics, you can skip down to the asterisks.

Okay, for everyone else, there are two things you should know about that would really help you enjoy this post.  The first thing is who Fred Phelps is.  He’s the “pastor” of Westboro Baptist Church. This is the church that protests dead soldiers’ funerals with the signs reading “God hates fags.” Most of us Christians don’t like Fred Phelps at all.

Including Derek Webb.

Which brings me to the second thing you might want to know about. It is Derek Webb‘s recent “Lost-style” mystery/game/scavenger hunt/fake-controversy thing.  Long story-short: email’s went out to fans from Webb saying “my new album’s controversial, my label doesn’t like it, I’ll figure something out.”  These emails had a code in them which led to the discovery of a website, twitter account, and other strange things (type “kickdrum”, then look right under his left eye, go to the site, type “youneverknow”. This is what use to pop up.). The unofficial hub of speculation has become the comments section of this article on Patrol Magazine.

Anyway, through his site and twitter account, Webb puts out “instructions” (i.e. “scavenger hunt clues”) for various cities in the the country.  People find the clue, email the code to him, and he releases a zip file of small 1 or 2 second sound clips.  No one has any clue what these sound clips are for.  Supposedly you’ll be able to put them together, but with how long they’ve been so far, there won’t be enough audio for even one full song, much less an entire album.  This has been going on for a couple of weeks with people finding these parts and no major updates happening.

***Until today.***

About 45 minutes prior to me writing this post, Derek Webb posted on the Twitter account a couple of messages that when decoded read “redownload stem 2”.  When you do that on this site, inside the zip file is the first song released off of Derek’s new album “Stockholm Syndrome”.  [NOTE: The song can now be found here] It’s called “Freddie, Please” and it is all about Fred Phelps.  It’s a really good song and it makes me really excited about the rest of the album.  It’s not the now-infamous “sh*t” song that will be on the album, but it’s one of the other anticipated songs.  Every one of Webb’s albums has been a completely different style and it looks like he’s taking a more ambient/drum machine/lounge-techno/postal service-style approach to this album.

Anyway, the song pretty much justifiably kicks Fred Phelps in the face.  Best I can tell, it’s from the perspective  of Jesus asking Phelps “How could you tell them you love me when you hate me?”  In the song, Jesus affirms his love for those despised in the world and says that when Phelp’s is picketing these funerals he is in essence “picketing my grave for loving the things you hate.”

Good for you, Derek.  So go download stem 2 at www.ParadiseIsAParkingLot.com and listen to this great song.  [NOTE: the song is no longer there. Instead, go here to download the song] Here are the lyrics:

Freddie, Please

Freddie, please
how could you do this to me?
How could you tell them you love me
when you hate me,
Freddie, please?

You know I’ll love you honey,
and i’ll bleed you dry with money
I’ll talk where I know you can hear.
Cause Freddie can’t you see,
brother, you’re the one who’s queer?

And the stone’s been rolled away
but you’re picketing my grave
for loving the things you hate.

Then why do you seek the living among the dead?

Freddie?

Tim Sinclair’s First Sermon Ever | (a too little, too late wedding gift)

/ Paul Burkhart / 1 Comment

One of my best friends, favorite guys, and men of God I respect the most, Tim Sinclair, preached his first sermon a few weeks back at Aletheia Church in Richmond.  He also just got married last Saturday.  I must admit that knowing Tim, I never saw him as a preacher or church planter.  I saw him as a great one-on-one ministry or small group kind of guy, but not necessarily as a preacher-behind-a-podium (or music stand) kind of guy.  Well, in short, this sermon blew me away.  I called him immediately after finishing the sermon to express my great joy in the gifting he had been hiding from us all along.  Really, it’s amazing.

So I encourage you all: download this sermon, listen to it, and leave a comment of encouragement for Tim, his budding ministry, and his budding marriage.

itunes_7

Click for Audio: Tim Sinclair: Rest.mp3

Faithful Forgiveness.pdf

Click for Manuscript: Tim Sinclair: Rest.pdf

The big news . . .

/ Paul Burkhart / 5 Comments

Nope, not engaged.

Several people here in Philadelphia know this, but I realize hardly anyone in Richmond does, so here I am writing this now.

I won’t be coming back to Westminster next year.

Long story short, my undergraduate loan payments have been steadily increasing and are now getting to a place where my parents can’t handle it alone – nor should they (before you all ask: no, this isn’t the kind of loan that waits until I’m done to require payments; no, my parents can’t consolidate it; yes, we’ve thought through it all).  I’ve decided to take at least a year off from graduate studies to get a full time job somewhere and help pay some things off.I’m focusing in Philadelphia, and trying to stay here, but I’m also looking at jobs in other places (especially Richmond).

Academically, what does this mean?Well, so far I’m still signed up for one counseling class next semester in the evenings, but I’m going to start applying to various Ph.D. programs and seeing what happens.There’s a program at Princeton I’ve fallen in love with in “Psychology and Social Policy”.I’ve realized that I was seeing seminary somewhat as a potential aid in getting into a Ph.D. program, but frankly, it’s seems to only be hurting my chances (on many levels).So, I’ll see if I can get in without it and then go back to Westminster afterwards if I want.

Practically, this means a lot more time and freedom to read what I want, write what I want, minister in different ways, and just generally feel like an actual member of society.I’ve already started writing a little bit more, doing more web stuff (Reform & Revive has been amazing recently!), and (I can’t believe I’m admitting this now), I’ve started a podcast which I’ll write on more later.

Spiritually speaking, what does this mean?Well, the answer to that question deserves a whole post in its self.I’ve been encouraged that as the workload lightens and I seem to be leaving seminary in a sense, I find myself driven more to prayer and the Word of God than while I was in seminary.They don’t tell you that seminary is not a secluded spiritual resort, but rather the darkest front lines of battle.This has been the most intense spiritual year of my life.I’ve had some of my darkest nights and moments this past year.I’ve gone my longest stints ever without drawing near to my Lord in any way.In short, it’s been rough.In short, it’s been painful.In short, I think I came to seminary too soon.I came too young.I wasn’t ready to handle the weight that this institution would hold.I have not developed the maturity and cultivation necessary to have an anchor in my soul beyond my sheer white-knuckled will.

Now, don’t get me wrong, this past year has been amazing.It’s also been the best year of my life, I think.That’s generally how God works.Very Dickensian: the best of times, the worst of times . . ..I wouldn’t give this past year back for anything.My love, affection, and knowledge of my Lord have grown exponentially.If I never go back to seminary I will forever be grateful to the Providence of God for giving me these two semesters.

God has always dealt with me in such a way that I had a very good sense of what the future held for me.This is the first time in my life that he has allowed everything to really fall apart all around me in a matter of weeks.And this is his mercy to me.This is his love for me.It is his commitment to make me need him, because he himself is what I need the most.He is my anchor.He is my certainty.He is my Lord, and my God, and I love him.

So, we’ll see what life holds.God has still been gracious to me in this time. I have great friends and my church (though still going through so much turmoil) has still been healthy and amazing.  I’ve even realized that my life as it was wasn’t very financially sustainable.  I couldn’t continue into my mid- and later-20s still asking my parents for rent money while working 15-hour work weeks at various low hourly rates.  I should have decided to so this regardless of money.

I feel it’s appropriate I’ve written this entire post while I sit in what may be my last seminary class ever, Medieval Church.Which is a appropriate, I suppose.Just like this strange period in history, and more specifically where we are in this last class, I sit here with my Rome having fallen, some dark ages having passed, standing on the cusp of my Reformation, waiting to rediscover the nearness of my Lord.

Feel free to ask any questions you may have.

Is it okay to laugh at Church signs?

/ Paul Burkhart / 1 Comment

Slate magazine has a great article and accompanying slideshow featuring their favorite church signs from around the country.  Some make it because of their phraseology, some their ghetto-ness, , and some because of their simple sincerity and devotion to our Lord, even though resources were obviously tight.  Below is my favorite.  You can find the pictures here.

16jpg

Also check out their other Easter and Religio-centric articles.  There’s at least something of interest to everyone.  And don’t worry, there’s even some stuff in there for all you atheists and agnostics out there!  Let me know what you think of any articles you read:

A Coffee Gospel & the Beauty of Christ

/ Paul Burkhart / Leave a comment

mosaicThis is a snippet from an Easter Service by Erwin McManus of Mosaic Church in Los Angeles.  His coffee story pretty much sums up my life.  I love it.  The rest is a freebie.  Enjoy!

Let me know if the audio doesn’t work.  It’s about 9 minutes long, so if you have a few minutes to spare, take full advantage of it.

“Beauty: Easter Service” by Erwin McManus (click here for download)

girl meets boy

/ Paul Burkhart / 1 Comment

I know I’m late on the whole Valentine’s Day thing, but here’s my contribution to the romance posting in the blogosphere.  This is part of an email I wrote a while ago to a really good friend.  She was really liking this guy and was about to hang out with him for the first time and was really nervous about how she was going to act during the evening.  I wrote this to her and she has since said it was very encouraging.  She has returned often since I wrote it.  So, with her permission, I’m posting this, hoping it might be helpful to anyone else out there.

___________________

My advice to you: relax, STOP OVERANALYZING, call some people, wear something really cute tonight, drink a beer (not some girly drink – just kidding), and be the flawed and weak sinner you are. Don’t force conversation to just be about Jesus because you think that’s what he would most like. Respond to his initiations. If you end up only talking to him the whole night because he won’t stop talking to you, then that’s a win – don’t freak out. don’t try to put forward some image – don’t. That will make you stressed out, cheesy, and end up walking away feeling like you’ve had your foot in your mouth the whole night.

All that you need to most fully be who you are has been perfectly accomplished on your behalf by another. Your righteousness is in heaven, so you don’t need to seek the approval or affection of any human being because both of those have been bestowed upon you by your Lover and King. So now walk in freedom. Walk in rest. Any man that is meant to love you in this way will love you as Christ does and see your sins and failings and insecurities more as cute quirks than deal-breaking negatives. So freely be the disgusting failure of a human being you are that deserves the full wrath of God to be poured out on her. But know that this same God – out of the cloud of wrath and anger that hung so perilously over your head – has extended a hand of mercy and grace. Know that you have taken that hand. Know that He has granted you to know the highest of all divine wisdom – the most intimate of His secret counsel – the Gospel. Know that he has clothed you in a Beauty far surpassing that of this world – His very own Righteousness. Know that while you were at your worst, He pursued you relentlessly and tirelessly just to bring you to Himself and love you and love you and love you. If you truly believe these things at the heart-faith level, then you’ll be able to do my greatest piece of advice for you and the thing to which i have been building in this email all along:

Relax and enjoy all this. Take in every moment. Take note of everything this raises in your heart. Let love be genuine. Hate what is evil but hold fast to what is good.

And know that this is good.

see ya sis,

–paul

Seminary Semester 1 Wrap-up

/ Paul Burkhart / Leave a comment

Semester 1 Stats:

  • Less than 4 months (Sept-Dec)
  • Pages of papers written: 114
  • Pages of notes taken: 154
  • Pages read: about 1,900 (+/-100)

Total pages written: 268 (I produced just over 13% of what I consumed)

Ending GPA: 3.2

Wow. This semester. Tomorrow begins semester 2 and I’m both excited and hesitant. This past semester gave me wrestlings and questions I never knew were there. It showed me depths and complexities of my own sin I never knew resided in my heart. I never knew just how undisciplined I am. It seems that the greater the work load, the more things I use to distract myself from doing it. The TV website hulu (that had that great Super Bowl commercial) consumed more hours of my life than did Greek or reading. I think I tripled how many shows I kept up with. It’s embarrassing and difficult for me to admit that, but it’s true. My Bible reading withered down to a few chapters a week. I didn’t get to spend time with anyone from my church. I questioned my place at the church, attempting to leave a few times before God exposed my pride and youthful arrogance and called me to submit to the place he had called me to. I realized I am self-willed, addicted to control and self-pleasure, and unwilling to properly steward the relationships and opportunities God places in my life.

In short: this semester was the most amazing 4 months of my life.

I just want to use the rest of this post to list out the main take-aways I got from this semester. If this is what just one semester does to me, I have no idea what 6 or 7 more will do. This is going to be an incredible experience. So I hope these lessons and wrestlings find a place in all your hearts as just one sojourner’s path down this bloody, uphill, broken, tear-stained, cross-bearing road called the Christian stumble.

  • My biggest take-away all semester: I am a weak and finite man wholly dependent on the grace of God for anything good within him.
  • The substance of this Christian life is one of God using people, circumstances, and His Spirit to show you the depths of your own weakness and sin, that you might see His love and faithfulness toward you to a greater degree and that this might lead you to worship and rest in Him more.
  • The entire logic and reason behind the whole of the Christian faith is ultimately circular, just like everyone else’s epistemology. But circular logic is okay, as long as you’re in the right circle.
  • God has so structured this “Christianity” thing such that it would all depend wholly on faith. Ultimately we believe in God because we do. Any reason other that that makes that the authority our faith is resting upon. This faith is messy. Our canon development, textual criticism, historiography, and even our very knowledge of God rests ultimately on our faith in Him, and not on any external standard or rule of truth.
  • I am more sinful than I ever dared imagined, but more loved than I could ever dare hope.
  • Due to the curse of God on this earth because of Adam, everything will war against me being the man God has called me to be.
  • God has given me the opportunities, things, and relationships in my life not to feed my lusts and insecurities, but rather for me to properly steward and enjoy them as God has providentially led them to be right now.
  • Sanctification is a crawl; it is no super-highway. It is progressive and rarely happens in spurts. I have waited too long for “the perfect sermon”, “the perfect song”, or “the perfect Bible verse” to change me rather than resting on and in the perfect righteousness of my Savior.
  • The imputation of the righteousness of Jesus Christ to His believers is my favorite and most precious doctrine of the Christian faith. Clothing His sin-stained Bride in the robe of His own life is the foundation of my acceptance and rest in the arms of my Lover.
  • Right theology must lead to both right practice and worship for it to be true Orthodoxy. Anyone studying the Bible who is not stirred at the affectional level is not doing theology, they are merely studying literature.

Semester 2 approaches tomorrow with me not as prepared for Greek as I should be, but with a fire in my bones and a grace upon my heart to find the discipline and time management to fully take advantage of all this semester has to offer. If you get this far down this post, please pray for me, that I might remain conscious of my finitude and weakness, trusting alone in all my Savior has accomplished on my behalf that I might freely enjoy Him and every nuance of who He is.

Grace and peace. (oh the beauty of those words!)

This is my Church: Epiphany Fellowship

/ Paul Burkhart / Leave a comment

This is my church.  I love them so much.  I became an official member last week, and with seminary has come a greater sense of how big of a deal church is to God, so this was a really significant thing for me.  Oh the places God takes us!  He is so good.  This is a video with some of our members “going through” our core values.  Enjoy.  You will.

Hey Tim, thanks for the link.